10 Tips for Overcoming Fear and Anxiety

7362406262_93f45d0052

Fear is a tormenting emotion, and if you struggle in this area, you know what I’m talking about. It has the potential to cause us to walk away from engaging in life and keep us from being all we were created to be. If we allow it to rule over us, our world will become smaller and smaller until we have shut out much of what God wants to bless us with. The more control we hand over to fear, the more it will be empowered to steal from us.  It consumes. It drives. It steals sleep and drives us down paths we never thought we’d go. Fear can cause us to hide from God, from others and even from our true selves.

Continue reading

Discerning between gossip and problem-solving

o-WHISPER-APP-LGBT-facebook

“The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit.” Proverbs 18:21

We’ve all done it. We’ve found ourselves caught up in conversations that we weren’t proud of, and someone else got hurt. Whether they knew it or not, their reputation had taken a hit, and the damage was done. Trying to undo that damage would be like trying to recover a basket of feathers thrown to the wind. If you’re like me, you may have found yourself asking, “Where does problem-solving end and gossip begin?” Or “How do I do life with ANYONE if I can’t discuss the problems at hand?” How do we discern the difference between problem-solving and gossip?  Here are some questions to ask yourself before talking negatively about someone:

Continue reading

Choosing unity over division

hand-1917895_960_720

Division.  It seems to be hitting us on every level; national, regional, and individual. It has the potential to steal what is precious to us if we yield to it. Division can separate us from those we love the most; it can take down cities, corporations and nations if left unchecked. There are a few things I wish I’d known sooner in life about division that could have saved a lot of heartache:

Continue reading

Waking up to the spirit of heaviness

reusewmod443

Have you ever woke up to recognize the presence of heaviness? Even before you’ve started your day or had time to think about anything, it’s already operating. Today was one of those days. One of the first things I like to do in those situations is a self-check. I examine myself to see if there is any place where I have come into agreement with, or yielded to that spirit.  Isaiah 61 tells us that it is an evil spirit: “The Spirit of the Lord GOD is upon me; because the LORD hath anointed me to…appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the LORD, that he might be glorified.”

Continue reading

Fear of man and fear of God

worried-girl-413690_960_720

Have you ever found yourself distracted by other people’s opinions of you, afraid of their disapproval? Recently I found myself dealing with some dealing with some anxiety over a situation and began to suspect that fear of man was the root of it. In my search to understand the topic, I learned that this fear can mean to be afraid or intimidated, but it can also mean to revere or respect. Scripture gives us some markers we can use to know whether we fear God or fear man:

Markers that indicate agreement with fear of man/lack of fearing God:

  1. Decisions motivated by the approval of people. What we fear reveals who we love and whose approval matters most to us. In an article entitled, Lay aside the fear of man|Desiring God, {9.16.16} author Jon Bloom explains it this way: “The person(s) to whom we ascribe most authority — to define who we are, what we’re worth, what we should do, and how we should do it — is the person(s) we fear the most, because it is the person(s) whose approval we want most. God designed us this way, for it reveals who and what our heart loves.” See also 1 Samuel 15:24
  2. Taking Flight when the heat is on can also indicate when fear of man is present. Examples of this would be when Elijah (normally a man of great courage) ran from Queen Jezebel (1 Ki 19:1-3) or when the Israelite army ran from Goliath. (1 Samuel 17:23-24)
  3. Passivity when doing the right thing would require action.
  4. Mistreating others, exploiting their weaknesses/handicaps (Lev. 19:14), taking advantage of others because you can, (Lev. 25:15) treating subordinates ruthlessly (Lev. 25:43) or withholding kindness from a friend in distress (Job 6:14).
  5. Tolerating controlling behavior in our relationships
    • Allowing others who do not have God-given authority in your life to act as if they do (posturing authority) (1 Sam. 15:24)
    • Allowing someone who does hold a legitimate position of authority in your life to over-step. When this is the case, there is a breakdown of mutual respect and healthy boundaries.  In Esther 3:5 we see Haman attempting to control Mordecai, (demanding that he bow down to Haman) but Mordecai refused because he feared God rather than man.

Markers of agreement with the Fear of God:

  1. Decisions are motivated by approval from God rather than people. Examples would be the midwives who refused to obey the King’s command to kill the newborn Israelite babies (Exodus 1:17-21)and Queen Esther going before the King in order to save her people at the risk of her own life. (Esther 4:15-16)
  2. Finding refuge in God (Psalm 31:19-20; 55:19;61:5) The reality that everyone needs refuge at times seems to be assumed in scripture. Not only do these individuals recognize their need for a refuge, but they tended to verbally express their need to God.
  3. Obeying God’s commands, even in the face of danger. (Eccl. 12:13-14, Job 1:9)
  4. Hating evil (Job 1:9)
  5. Idols in your life have been cast down (2 Kings 17:33-37)
  6. Treating others with justice and honor (Lev. 25:17; 19:14;25:35)

How to come out of agreement with Fear of man:

  1. Repent if you have allowed the fear of others’ reactions keep you from obeying God.
  2. Forgive those who have intimidated, threatened or harmed you.
  3. When you need courage to face your fears, tell God how you feel. Ask Him for the courage you need.
  4. Do the right thing even if you’re afraid of how others will react. Even if you have to do it shaking in fear, press through. Fear of man weakens its’ hold on us each time we confront our fears.
  5.  Seek out Bible verses that build your faith and courage.

Scriptures for overcoming fear of man:

Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ.” Galatians 1:10

“Fearing people is a dangerous trap, but trusting the LORD means safety.” Proverbs 29:25

“…when I am afraid, I will put my trust in you. I praise God for what he has promised. I trust in God, so why should I be afraid? What can mere mortals do to me?” Psalm 56:3-4

“I tell you, My friends, do not be afraid of those who kill the body and after that can do no more.” Luke 12:4

“So we can confidently say, “The Lord is my helper; I will not fear; what can man do to me?” Hebrews 13:6

“For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.” 2 Timothy 1:7

““I, I am he who comforts you; who are you that you are afraid of man who dies, of the son of man who is made like grass,…” Isaiah 51:12

“Stop regarding man in whose nostrils is breath, for of what account is he?” Isaiah 2:22

“Nevertheless, many of the leaders believed in Him; but because of the Pharisees they did not confess Him, for fear that they would be put out of the synagogue, for they loved praise from men more than praise from God…” John 12:42-43

 

Depression and Self-Pity

depression-sad-mood-sorrow-dark-people-love-wallpaper-10To a person who has never experienced depression, it would probably be easy to say, “Why don’t you just get over it?” But to the one suffering from it, things don’t look that easy.

During the years that I struggled with depression, I felt like my heart was bleeding. As much as my husband and friends tried to help, they eventually had to tend to other things, leaving me feeling abandoned in my pain. If I were to paint a picture of what that felt like, it was like I had been in a horrible car accident and was bleeding profusely. My friends and family would come and go, but no one was able to extricate me from the car and get me into an ICU. What others could not see is that I had been in an accident of sorts, but it wasn’t physical. It was emotional and spiritual. It sounded like such a comfort to me to die and go to heaven where the pain would be over. Continue reading

Overcoming Depression Through Restoring Trust

10Have you ever wondered why you were doing pretty good emotionally, and then another bout of depression hit you like a tidal wave? I want to share a troubleshooting tip that I learned during the years that I spent recovering from depression. If you find that this applies to you, you’ll be amazed at the instantaneous relief it can bring: Continue reading

What does it mean to walk whole?

images-1

Walking whole. What exactly does that look like? When I consider what it might look like to walk whole, images of some of the great men and women of the ages come to mind. Men like William Wilberforce, who were willing to endure great opposition from men in order to fulfill their purpose.  Wilberforce had few allies when he began his quest to abolish the slave trade in England. His burden for slaves burned in his soul, his health nearly destroyed by it. His passion would not be silenced until many years later, when he succeeded in his mission, even his one-time enemies couldn’t help but commend his dedication. Continue reading

Discernment and The gift of the discerning of spirits

So perhaps you’ve taken one of those spiritual gifts assessment and realized that you have the gift of the discerning of spirits and/or discernment. While this is an incredibly powerful tool, the gift of discernment can be a lot to manage on an emotional level. If you don’t understand this gifting, you may find it easy to falsely believe that you are emotionally unstable; fine one minute and then the next minute you are completely distracted by intense feelings…feelings like fear, despair, lust or weariness. When this happens, you may find yourself thinking, “I thought I had overcome _____ (fear, greed, lust, etc.), how could I possibly be dealing with it again?” Continue reading